MyAllusion

For some unknown reason, I love to make snarky comments during awards shows (and apparently, political debates). Since I truly doubt that any of my guy friends that follow me on Twitter would like 57 tweets about Eva Longoria’s dress (fabulous) or how Mickey Rourke will give me nightmares (or maybe they would), I decided to move this over to my blog, where I can feel safe knowing that I can filfill my bizarre desire to blab to the interwebs in a place where I can torture my one remaining reader (HAI Crazy Ex-Boyfriend! I seez yoou!!)

So let’s get this party started. Ooh! Eva Mendez!!! She might tip over from that necklace! Here’s hoping!

Since I haven’t been paying attention to the Categories/Winners as much as the attendees, here’s the rundown of the winners. You know, just in case you would like to skip ahead and could care even LESS about my randomness

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10:59 – Will now add Slumdog Millionaire to my list. Is now getting long. Goodnight and blather at you later!

10:53 – He thanked his DOGS? Well, I guess he WAS off the radar for a long time…

10:49 – *Shiver* Mickey Rourke. I wonder if he smells as bad as he looks.

10:42 – Love love love Rainn Wilson

10:39 – She’s loved Leo with all her heart for 13 years…oh yeah, and her husband too.

10:37 – Let’s see if Angelina turns the Death Stare on Kate Winslet……nope. More interesting, is Kate going to hyperventilate?

10:27 – OK. Starting to get bored. Even with Borat on stage. Wait. Especially with Borat on stage.

10:19 – Bets on if Colin Farrell is sober. Is he tweaking or just tripping out because he’s not tweaking? You tell me.

10:17 – Sandra Bullock looks fabulous. Why does everyone hate her again?

10:14 – Wow, was Danny Boyle tearing his hair out before his win?

10:12 – Oh, Emma Thompson and Dustin Hoffman SHOULD do a project together!

10:03 – Nothing like a good train story at an awards ceremony.

9:57 – Spielberg’s work is amazing. I can’t believe his range. I swear he’s directed 3/4 of the people in the room. And produced for the other 1/4.

9:56 – Ellliiiioootttt.

9:54 – Love Martin Scorcese. Who better to introduce Spielberg?

9:49 – Why is Cameron Diaz there? Anyone?

9:47 – 30 Rock is CLEANING UP. Tina Fey is amazing.

9:43 – It looks like Kate Bekinsdale would rather been ANYWHERE except standing next to Sean Combs. Beautiful dress though.

9:42 – Sigh. I must have been ruined by the Broadway musical, because I despised Mamma Mia! the movie.

9:36 – Please tell me WHAT Tracy Morgan is on.

9:33 – Weeds. I wish I had Showtime.

9:30 – It must be getting hot in there. Everyone’s so SHINY.

9:28 – Can Renee Zellwieger look stranger? I can’t even explain it.

9:21 – I now totally regret never watching 30 Rock. Ryan, can you catch me up?

9:20 – Will have to see Slumdog Millionaire. Again, Kristina…Jen?

9:18 – Wow. Seth Rogan. Wow.

9:11 – Has Laura Linney AGED?

9:08 – I saw Maggie Gyllenhal take some hard questions about Heath Ledger in the pre-shows. I’ve got to give her serious credit for simply telling people that it’s simply not appropriate to ask these types of questions at an awards show (let alone anywhere else).

9:04 – You think Colin Farrell could have spit out his gum before he went onstage? Sigh. OH! But nice reference to his previous *sniffing* problem. Props!

8:57 – If Tom Cruise gets a Golden Globe over Heath Ledger, I’ll, well, it’s not appropriate. Oh, thank Jeebus. Crisis averted. Nicely handled acceptance as well.

8:56 – Demi, you go mamma bear! Way to horrify your daughter onstage over her posture!!

8:52 – Drew and Jessica…you think they’ve both been injected with the same brand of crazy? Also didn’t know that John Adams was produced by Tom Hanks. I’m glad it won just to hear Tom give crap to everyone in his speech.

8:51 – What’s wrong with Jake Gyllenhall? Has it been so long since he’s done anything other than hang out with Reece that he forgot how to speak?

In totally unrelated news, just noticed that ‘hangover’ is a recurring theme in Goggle Search Terms to get to my blog. Outstanding. Also seems to be a popular stop off spot to get hangover-related images. Huh.

8:44 – Am falling in love with Sally Hawkins. It refreshing so see someone win one of these awards and truly be stunned and grateful.

8:41 – You know Johnny Depp, its a sign you need to WASH YOUR HAIR if it keeps itching like that. Just sayin’

8:40 – And now will have to see Wall-E, just for the bubblewrap.

8:39 – Am I wrong for JUST NOT GETTING the Jonas brothers?

8:38 – Now definitely need to see Happy Go Lucky. Kristina, Jen?? Whaddya think?

8:37 – Nice Moet champagne product placement on the stars tables.

8:36 – Dude, is Ricky Gervais drinking a beer onstage? LOVE HIM!

8:31 – So what’s up with Drew Barrymore and Jessica Lange being hermetically sealed together in the name of promoting an HBO movie? I hope they like each other…

8:30 – Love Anna Paquin in True Blood. Loathe Anna Paquin in real life….but she won!

8:27 – Jorge who?

Before I figured out how NOT to torture the few friends I do have (aka, Tweets before I got some smarts):